Sometimes ‘everything looks good’ is the opposite of what you want to hear.
After my first panic attack I didn’t know what had happened. For weeks I thought it was a massive blood sugar crash, compounded by other factors I was yet to identify. I’ve always needed to eat pretty regularly and felt my blood sugar drop when I’ve gone too long between meals.
Layman’s terms: I easily get hangry.
I decided to have my annual physical. All bloodwork was normal. I joined a telehealth service and we pulled a shitload of blood to test everything under the sun. All bloodwork was normal. We did a cortisol awakening response test that measures how your cortisol levels vary during the day based on the diurnal pattern they should follow. Mine were elevated in the early morning compared to ‘normal’, but nothing crazy out of the ordinary.
I did not want to hear ‘everything looks good’. I wanted to hear ‘we now have a clear idea of what happened and a protocol to treat it going forward’.
I was left with no answers, just more questions.
I researched everything, including:
- What does it feel like when you have a stroke?
- What does it feel like when you have a heart attack?
- What does it feel like when your blood sugar crashes, and you almost pass out?
Interestingly, the symptoms of these events/conditions all share commonalities with panic attacks. This is not a calming discovery. Given all my bloodwork was normal (boring), I eventually believed indeed it was a panic attack. That sent me down a rabbit hole I chased for weeks: how the hell do panic attacks occur, and is there any way to test for them?
Being an analytical dude, I kept looking for other tests, from food intolerance to organic (amino) acid tests to see if anything stood off the page that could better explain what happened. Shockingly, there was an answer: ‘nothing is wildly out of line and you’re pretty much normal’.
That leads me to the main point of this chapter. There is another dimension each one of us possesses, an energetic one, that does not appear on any lab result, cannot be tested, and yet it is there. And it is a powerful element that cannot be ignored.
“Of course you’re going to look normal on the labs, the issue is energetic,” my dear friend and acupuncturist Remee said to me. I’ve been going to acupuncture for over a decade and still I had no idea what the hell she meant. I probably looked like my dog’s face if I were to ask him to drive to the store and pick up some sushi.
I had to sit with the idea and understand there are other dimensions that govern our bodies, and that the energy that illuminates each of us can sometimes be out of balance. Sometimes, egregiously so. And if this is out of balance it will not appear on any lab result, any blood panel, any test, period. In severe cases, it can lead to panic attacks. And that sucks.
Reflecting now, it was helpful to have all the bloodwork and tests completed because it gives peace of mind that by and large, I’m ok (physically). It was a good step. Had something abnormal appeared, I could have focused on addressing that challenge. I also know (now) that in the event bloodwork comes back OK and you keep hearing ‘you’re normal’, it is perfectly OK to acknowledge that things are anything but normal. You need to keep pushing if you’re willing to do the work. It is OK, even necessary, to keep questioning and seeking – you just may need to change to whom you are asking the questions.
The good news? I’ve found you can treat energetic symptoms.
houckOUT 